Sundays...

...have taken on a comforting, regular form. They start out relaxed but not lazy (at least not too lazy). I am aware of both the holiday and the inevitable Monday. I do the laundry, mop up the floors in my room, inhale the fragrance of cleaning sprays and oil essences. The radio murmurs in the background, a reliable companion. The laundry tumbles out warm and fluffy; I bury my head in it for a few minutes, comforting myself in the leftover warmth before it evaporates.

Modern Indian Woman?

Results of a quick Google search

I've often wonder about what the term 'modern Indian woman' means, especially as modern can still be said with a hint, if not an overtone of derision. I have often heard the statement 'you are too modern' being thrown around, with the intent to insult and hurt. Often I've heard the modern used as a 'trait', 'an attitude', which women need to phase out as they grow older (read: arrive at a marriageable age).

The No-Nonsense Guide to International Development

I am doing an independent study for a class and part of the 'research' (and I am using that term with a little bit of irony these days, and that's a post for another day) is understanding the history and evolution of development studies as a field. This of course necessitates an understanding, even if cursory, of the history of development. Ambiguous, contentious, contested, the list of adjectives is endless and is you can see fraught with doubt. Of course at this stage in my program I cannot claim complete ignorance of the history of development, but my understanding is fragmented, often starting arbitrarily post the second World War. I am not going to devote this post to rehash what has been said and written eloquently by many others, I will save that for my'research'. But I will strongly recommend 'The No-Nonsense Guide to International Development' by Maggie Black to you.

You must.

Notes on a conference

 I've been at a conference in DC this week (an entire week, I myself am not quite sure why). This is a trip that I had to cut short and I return home day after tomorrow and I am looking forward to that. It has been nice to get a change of scenery, parts of this semester have been the equivalent of walking through water and quicksand all together. It was also the first conference where I presented (alone) from some research (really basic) I am doing on understanding expectations of organizations that host students for fieldwork. I think the presenting bit is supposed to be a milestone of sorts (but am also aware that a lot of people present at this conference, it seems to be more inclusive than exclusive, which is nice for newbies like me). I was really nervous but different folks pointed out that depending on who is presenting sessions are sparsely attended (true for the one I was in) and people present preliminary results of their work (I did).

Home

I take solace in the fact that there is nothing new or unique in my search and longing for home(s). It is an old, some say eternal longing, and perhaps one of the few that unite instead of dividing us.

You are tired. And loved.

I am closer to thirty than I ever have been in my life (I have a birthday tomorrow. Today depending on which timezone you look at?). I've become neither big nor small on birthdays. It is what it is. Sometimes they are full of wonderful bits, at others they disappoint and leave a bitter aftertaste. Just like people? Just like people. Also, just like life. Another year gone by, I check for the losses and scars, I say a quick thanks for all that went well, for all the scrapes that didn't end too badly, for the love and kindness and warmth and hug and hope that refuses to die.